Exodus 18 | And on the [mumble]eth day, Jethro created Red Tape, And He Saw That It Was Good

Jethro (Moses's (Moses'?  ...Moses's.  Yeah.) father-in-law) heard about the Divine Smackdowns God used to deliver the Israelites from Egypt.  After Moses sent away his wife Zipporah, Jethro let her and the kids stay for a while.

Then Jethro and company went to hang out with Moses in the wilderness near the Mountain of God. 

Moses met his father-in-law and kissed him (but, y'know, no homo).

Belaboring the point, maybe, but that part of the story still gives me the jibblies.

Moses told Jethro about all the stuff that went down in Egypt, the manna, the wood-water, etc.  Jethro--the priest, remember, of Midian--was happy to hear about all the stuff the LORD had done for Israel and proclaimed the God of the Israelites to be greater than any other gods he'd ever come across.

"And lo, it came to pass," read Jethro, "that that no-good scumbag jerk Loki done stole my bike, and he did perform a Wheelie, and he did pedal off to the Rainbow Bridge."

The next day Moses donned a black robe and served as a judge for the people, dispensing justice among the varying petty quarrels that for some reason tend to disrupt happy bands of merry folk when meandering about in a desert for forty agonizing years.  This made no sense to Jethro, as Jethro was capable of logic and reason.

"How come you're doin' all the judgework yerownself?" asked Jethro.  "You can't handle this alone.  You need a top-down hierarchy.  Appoint trustworthy men over divisions of Israelites in the tens, hundreds, thousands, and up as necessary.  The crap will filter up to you, and you will filter the crap to God.  God will dispense justice upon the crap and you will trickle the justified crap back down to the people."

"Holy crap, man, you're right!" said Moses, thanking Jethro for the advice and immediately heeding it.  He chose officials as judges for divisions in the thousands, hundreds, fifties, and tens.  The most difficult cases they brought to Moses, but the simple ones they ruled on themselves.

"Fine, Achi.  You can be the car this time.  Metuka, sorry, honey, but you'll have to be like, the thimble, or the dog, or something.  PLEASE tell me you've already decided on the 'Free Parking' thing."

Moses and Jethro parted on good terms and Jethro went back to Midian.